Thursday, September 25, 2008
Mmm, Fried chicken....
Fly vixen! Give me heart Disease,
But need you in my kitchen.
You a bird, but you ain't a key,
Got wings but you can't fly away from me.
Driving in your bucket seats, all the way from Kentucky,
To fuck with me.
Look what you done to me, was number one to me!
After you shower, you and your gold medal flour,
Then you rub on hot oil for 'bout a half an hour.
You in your hot tub, I'm looking at you salivating,
Dry you off, I got your paper towel waiting .
Lay you down cause you're red hot.
Louisiana style you make my head rock
Then I flock to the bed then, "Plop",
When we done, I need rest.
Don't know a part of you that I love best;
Your legs or your breast.
Misses Fried Chicken, you gon' be a nigga death.
Created by southern black women
To serve master's guest.
You gon' be a nigga death.
Misses Fried Chicken
You was my addiction, Dripping with cholest'
Like Greeks with his felafel, Or Italians with his to-mato pasta,
Or roti is to a Rasta.
Trapping me, you and your friend mac and cheese,
Candy yams, collard greens.....
But you knocking me to my knees.
It's killing me when I'm this high,
Nothing I need more than a fish fry.
Shit, It taste good, I can't lie.
It's like you're walking out a tanning saloon,
When I pull you out the oven, from baking I got you on my mind.
Rubbing that sun tan lotion all up over your body,
So amazing, how you sparkle when I glaze you swine.
Hey, my pretty hamhock, it's so feminine
The way you submitting, And how you gave me power.
To massaging me to shower you with lemon water,
Marinate you with season, you dipping. You in chowder
Baby, It's like you at the spa;
The way you gently lay in the pan,
While you enjoying you butter milk treatment.
I sit and watch the grease sizzle bubbling
On your skin.
Despite the funny fragrance, Still I lick my finger frequent.
In any event, I'm reflecting on all the signs saying that I got,
I shouldn't fuck with you.
But the way you taste made it hard to resist when I put my mouth on you,
But that's another issue.
Butterflies up in my stomach when I laid eye on you;
Was it infection manifesting?
Confused over the feeling, impatiently eating you
Trichina worm worm chewing on the walls of my intestine.
I'ma eat you until there's nothing left.
Til my very last breath, You gon be a nigga death.
Despite appearin’ the best and specialize in cooking swine as a chef.
You gon be a nigga death.
Who cares if the swine is mixed with rat, cat, and dog combined?
Yes, I eat the shit to death
Ain't that some shit?
I'ma eat some shit
Until what I'm eating KILLS ME!
And I choose to do that
Cause that's just what niggas do
Tuesday, September 23, 2008
•There is an eloquence in true enthusiasm that is not to be doubted.
•People are particularly stupid. I can't talk to any more of them.
•I'd drive a stake through your heart, but I don't think anything could kill you.
•Never Explain-->your Enemies do not care and your Friends will not believe you anyway.
•If you behave in a manner pleasing to most, then you are probably doing something wrong. The masses have never been arbiters of the sublime, and they often fail to recognize the truly great individual.
•Reality is ruining my life!
we're just racing time, where's the finish line?
I been down this road, too many times before
I'm not lovin you, the way I wanted to...
Be HONEST no matter what.
1. What Is your natural hair color?
2. Where was your default pic taken?
Honestly: this one is not me
3. What's your middle name?
4. Your current relationship status?
5. Honestly, does your crush like you back?
Honestly: I don't think he cares :(
6. What is your current mood?
7.What color underwear are you wearing?
Honestly: Brown argyle
8.What makes you happy?
10. If you could go back in time, and change something what would you change?
11. If you MUST be an animal for ONE day- what would you be?
12. Ever had a near death experience?
13. Something you do a lot?
14. What's the name of the song stuck in your head right now?
Honestly: Love Lockdown
15. Who did you copy and paste this from?
Honestly: Some chick on Facebook
16. Name someone with the same b-day as you?
17. When was the last time you cried?
Honestly: I don't remember
18. Have you ever sung in front of a large audience?
Honestly: Who you kidding?!?!
19. If you could have one super power what would it be?
Honestly: Time travel
20. What's the first thing you notice about the opposite/same sex?
Honestly: Their hair
21. What do you usually order from Starbucks?
Honestly: Tai chi tea....or chi tea or something....or the strawberry cream thing
22. What's your biggest secret?
Honestly: i'm broke....:(
23. Favorite color?
24. When was the last time you lied?
25. Do you still watch kiddy movies or TV shows?
27. What are you eating or drinking at the moment?
28. Do you speak any other language?
29. What's your favorite smell?
Honestly: Fresh Air (is that a smell???)
30. If you could describe your life in one word what would it be?
31. When was the last time you gave/received a hug?
Honestly: This morning
32. Have you ever been kissed in the rain?
33. What are you thinking about right now?
Honestly: An oil change
34. What should you be doing?
35. What was the last thing that made you upset/angry?
Honestly: Thinking about the results of my quiz
36. How often do you pray?
37. Do you like working in the yard?
38. If you could have any last name in the world, what would you
39. Do you act differently around your crush?
40. Name one song that reminds you of an ex?
Honestly: .. love lockdown
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
Lauren's too needy.
p.s that pic up there is old. You can tell b/c Heidid hasn't had any work done in it, lol.
Monday, September 15, 2008
[ ] You own over 10 bottles of nail polish
[x] You own/owned perfume that cost over $60
[x] You had/have fake nails
[ ] You have more body/hair products than you can use
[ ] You have enough clothes to cover an entire refugee camp
[ ] You have enough pictures to create your own wallpaper
[x] Have a hair color that is not your natural color
[x] "blonde moments" at least once a day
[x] Constantly keep your phone at your side
[x] Dance around in your room when nobody else is home
 Refuse to go out in public without makeup
Total So Far: 6
DO YOU ADORE:
[ ] Makeup
[ ] Glitter
[x] The color pink
[ ] Mirrors
[ ] Chick flicks
[ ] Rainbows
[ ] Unicorns
[ ] Disney Movies
[ ] Candles
[ ] Flowers
[ ] Stuffed Animals
Total So Far: 11
DO YOU SHOP AT:
[ ] American Eagle
[ ] Warehouse
[ ] Abercrombie & Fitch
[ ] Coast
[ ] Claire's
[ ] Express
[ ] Garage
[ ] MAC
[ ] Sephora
[ ] Bebe
Total So Far: 11
DO YOU SAY:
[ ] Oh God
[ ] Hun
[ ] That's hot
[ ] Really though
[ ] Darling
[ ] Totally
[x] For Sure
[ ] Fabulous
[ ] Fantastic
Total So Far: 18
Do You Read:
[ ] Seventeen
[x] Cosmo politan
[ ] Glamour
[ ] Marie Claire
[ ] Elle Girl
[ ] Teen Vogue
[ ] People
[ ] Us Weekly
[ ] Self
[ ] Dlisted.com
[ ] 17online.com
[ ] people.com
[ ] usmagazine.com
[ ] popsugar.com
[ ] Pink Is The New Blog.com
Total So Far: 22
You Love These Movies:
[ ] Legally Blonde
[ ] Elizabethtown
[ ] Mean Girls
[x] Now & Then
[x] The Notebook
[x] A Walk to Remember
[ ] Sweet Home Alabama
[ ] Where the Heart is
[ ] Just my luck
[ ] John Tucker Must Die
[ ] Centerstage
[ ] Bring it On
[x] How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days
[ ] Mona Lisa Smile
[ ] My GirlTotal
So Far: 26
[ ] America's Next Top Model
[ ] Project Runway
[ ] Desperate Housewives
[ ] The Simple Life
[x] PCD present: GiRLiCiOUS
[ ] 8th & Ocean
[ ] Grey's Anatomy
[ ] The O.C.
[x] Laguna Beach/The Hills
[ ] House
[ ] Gilmore Girls
[ ] Veronica Mars
COUNT UP HoW MANY YOU CHECKED. THAT IS YOUR PERCENTAGE
Thursday, September 11, 2008
[x] Fast food
 Peanut butter
[x] Chicken wings
[x] Hot dogs
[x] Grilled cheese
 Green beans
[x] Brussels sprouts
 Lima beans
[x] Ice cream
[x] Cup cakes
 Whipped cream
 Chocolate covered strawberries
[ ] Creme puffs
[x] Chocolate covered pretzels
GRAND TOTAL: 51
Now, add up the number of x's and multiply by 2 to get the weight that you should be.
I should be 102......
When I heard this, I called him back and left a message for him, because even though he didn't pick up my call, I didn't trip out on him.....or at least I thought I wouldn't...... And I said to him " So what, I was out with my friends, i'm a grown woman, it's the weekend!!! Oh, so what if I don't answer my phone, what if I'm not alone, i'm with him. What's it to you? I need to get out, you are killing me, and I just wanna get out, you are killing me. Whatcha wanna do? I cannot escape, no matter what I do, can't get away from you. Oh, call me everyday and that there ain't never cool, getting on my nerves. I think it's time you knew; only gave you my number cause, drinks made you cuter, plus you were looking sad and lonely. Oh but that's all it was, just put you in the game and here you go complainin' what's up with you? I need to get out. You are killing me."
So maybe I over reacted, but it was annoying how he used to call all the time and complain and shit. I didn't know it was so mean, until I said it, to be honest. But he didn't take it that way, instead he called back and left this message (because now I was avoiding him) "Like whoa lil mama, it's the second time I'm callin' your number. I ain't chasin', I ain't even no runner. Don't you know I push the Hummer in the summer, huh? How you hard to be reached? I can put you where you hard to be reached, white sand on the balls of your feet. You can scream, ain't no body gon' be sleep, this your own private beach, ha, hand when it comes to sex, just a little bit of love and little bit of that, maybe push it back where your ribs is at. Share a bowl of crunch berries, how real is that? haha I'm just jokin' of course. I'm trying to put your sex game back on course. If you feelin' dry, like you don't get moist. If you ever get a minute holla at yo' boy."
We're going out on Saturday............
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
♥♥♥ her sooooo much
Tuesday, September 9, 2008
Monday, September 8, 2008
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties.
I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. ~Frank Sinatra
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people
"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading." ~ Henny Youngman
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you.
24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not. ~ Stephen Wright
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all get drunk and go to heaven! ~ Brian O'Rourke
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. ~ Benjamin Franklin
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza. ~ Dave Barry WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can! ~Dave Howell
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin, of Cheers:
One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. Here's how it went: "Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first . This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not
Can you stop flirting with my boss and start flirting with me instead??? She's married.....
you can reach me at 905-***-2981, 416-***-6355 and at 69 *****wood Cres.
WAIT......., who is your trainee??? You two look alittle bit too close for comfort..........too chummy if you ask me......
Damn you, Mr. Postman for pulling at my heart strings.......
Friday, September 5, 2008
Thursday, September 4, 2008
Just thought I would share some pertinent info for anyone who's child is taking the school bus for the first time:
Ontario's school population includes over two million students. Of those, over 800,000 use school buses every day. This includes children who are bused from rural areas and children who participate in special programs, such as French immersion, as well as those who use school buses for field trips.
Research conducted by Transport Canada shows that school bus travel is one of the safest methods of transportation - and is 16 times safer than travelling in the family car, based on the number of passengers and kilometres travelled. Although school buses have an excellent safety record, mishaps can happen, and injuries can result. These can include both children riding on the bus and children who suffer injuries as a result of being hit by their own school bus or by other vehicles.
Rules for getting on the bus safely:
Rules for Safe School Bus Riding:
- Take your seat promptly and sit properly, facing forward at all times.
- Hold bags and parcels in your lap.
- Do not stick your feet into the aisle: someone might trip.
- Keep your head and arms-everything-inside the bus.
- Don't throw anything out the windows or around in the bus.
- Talk quietly. The driver must concentrate to drive the bus safely.
- Save snacks for snack time at school or till you get home. They may spill or you may choke if the bus goes over a big bump.
- No fighting, shouting or playing in or around the bus.
- Always follow the bus driver's instructions.
Rules for leaving the bus safely:
- When you leave the bus, hold the handrail and take two large steps away from the bus.
- To cross the street in front of the bus, walk ahead at least ten giant steps (three metres). Cross only when the driver gives a signal. Cross the street in single file.
- If you drop something near the bus, don't pick it up. Tell the driver or other adult.
- If everyone is getting off the bus, the people at the front leave first. Do not push.
If you don't stop for a school bus, you can be fined $400 to $2000 and get six demerit points for a first offence. If you break the rule a second time, the penalty is a fine of $1000 to $4000 and six demerit points. You could also go to jail for up to six months.
School buses are designed to protect passengers through "compartmentalization". This means that school buses have:
- seats with high backs
- the seats positioned close together to form compartments
- seats filled with energy-absorbing material
- strong seat anchorages
Parents also need to be aware of additional information about seat belts:
- to be effective, seat belts must be worn correctly (snug and low on the hips) for full protection. Seat belts which are not correctly worn may cause injuries.
- because school vehicles carry passengers from the very young to high school students, seat belt fit must be readjusted and use monitored to ensure safety.
- because of increased use, seat belts on school buses are subject to more wear and tear, and their condition must be monitored.
- studies using dummies have shown that adding seat belts to the current school bus seating arrangement can actually increase the chance of head and neck injuries in restrained passengers.
So this little, but scary, creature has suddenly become an inhabitant in our household as of late. How I found out, was watching t.v in the basement on tuesday night and I saw something mobe out of the corner of my eye. Quickly moved my attention to the wall and noticed this creature scurrying around. OMG!!! Needless to say, I was a little bit petrified. First thing I looked for was something to smush it with. Found my daughter's slipper. Didn't look like it would do the job, to be honest. Plus, I didn't want to have to think about touching it, even w/ a slipper. Plus those legs were pretty long, I had this notion in my head that if I did hit it, that some of those lose appendages will come out from under the slipper and sting me anyway. So, I got the Raid from upstairs. Now, I had issues with this too, as I thought that as soon as I sprayed it, this creature would also run away and I wouldn't be able to get it and it would somehow become immune or it would jump on me. I did a test spray before going back downstairs. So I went downstairs and sprayed it good. Even when it fell off the ceiling, I stilled sparyed it. I'm sure I used up more than half the can. NTS: must buy my mom a can of Raid.
So I did some research and was able to find out some info regarding this strange creature that I have not seen before. I googled basement bugs and some images popped up of my mysterious creature and this is how I found out that it has a name: House Centipede.
Here are some facts: Basically, they are good for house! Who would've guessed?!?! They feed off household pests like spiders, ants, termites and silverfish. So if you can deal with seeing these creature about, they actually help out. The house centipede is 25–50 mm (one to two inches) long and has an average of 15 pairs of very long, delicate legs and a rigid body, which enables it to run with surprising speed – up to 406 mm (16 inches) per second. Also, even though they are venomous, most House Centipedes bites cannot penetrate human skin. Those that can give an effect no worse than a minor bee sting. The bite cannot even affect regular household pets. Oh, and they love to breed!! Great.....