Tuesday, July 7, 2009

She knows I'm watching

She likes the way I stare.......

**WARNING WARNING WARNING***
Really, really, really long post


I'm not sure if you remember this or not, but if not, refresh yourself. At the end of it, there was a part about Officer ****....or Nat....or Knatt....Well, whatever, Officer Looking-Good-but-probably-married-and-somewhat-psycho-but-nonetheless-drop-dead-gorgeous.
Ok, some back info on our "history" if you will. We were involved in a case together about 6 years ago (I was a witness to a heinous crime and he was one of the officers that were called to the scene). Well, the crime ended making it's way to trial, so I had to give my statement to him. He was definately a hottie. And a cop!! I ♥ cops. Anyways, he called one day to give an update on the trial or something, I honestly don't remember, and he ended up asking me out for coffee!! I knew that I was blushing on the phone. I'm a nerd, I know. Anyways, we tried to find some time to meet up for a while. He always wanted to meet while he was working. My mother made it known that she thinks he's married, and that's why he's always trying to get together when he works. And he only called me when he was at work too. So right before we actually went to trial, he went MIA. I called his division (Canadian terms for precinct) and he was on a leave of absense. Meli and I both thought that he had gone crazy and was taking time off. My mother thought that he went to India to get married. He was now an additional write off in my history of failed relationships.
Well, apparently Officer Hottie is back in town. Turns out that he really did go on a leave of absense. He went undercover to Vancouver, and 'leave of absense' is the terminology that you use for such occassions. How do I know, you ask. Well, he just happened to drive by my house when I wasn't home, and my parents and their subtle selves waved to him. WAVED.TO.HIM!!!! He came into the driveway and started talking to them and my dad ended up telling him I wasn't home and that I would be home tomorrow. Needless to say, I was giddy. Sure my parents lack tact, but hey, they get the job done.
The next day, Officer Too-Hottie shows up again!! I was at a birthday party though, so I wasn't home. I suspected he might be coming, but I didn't want to be home anyways, because I didn't get my eyebrows done. Plus, I had gained some weight in my mid section, and I am now a fat ass. And since he's gorgeousssss, I didn't want to be a let down. So, my dad gave him my number. Did I mention that I love my daddy. Yes, even my dad knew about my infatuation with Officer Gorgeous. So at the party, Officer Hottie ends up calling and we talk for a bit. After a little conversation, I had to go back, because it was Baby's turn at eating the donut on a string. Don't ask. Well Officer Mui-Good-Looking and myself end up texting for the whole party.
Now, here's the interesting part; he was looking for a booty call. He made it known right off the bat. I got offended and shut down the conversation. I mean, is that even allowed for a cop? Aren't they supposed to be society's prime citizens?!?! Since when is being easy a characteristic of an outstanding member of society??? Anyways, as per her, there was a better way to handle the situation. So a week after the shutdown conversation, I sent another text to apologise for the way I handled the situation, but I wasn't interested in a physical relationship only. I wasn't necessarily looking for long term, but definately not looking for booty calling. He said he understood but still wanted to talk. I honestly liked the attention I was getting from him.
He was still all about the coffee thing, but I really do have a tight schedule and don't really have time to date. So one night, he's like he'll bring the coffee to my house and we can just sit outside. I said ok, as that is all that I could do at the moment. See how exciting my social life is; I only have time for a coffe at 10:30 at night. I digress. Here are some "highlights" of our conversation:

OH (Officer Hottie): I moved to **** from ********
Me: Me too. Where abouts in *******?
OH: *****. It was such a shock to move from *****, because my best friend was black, and I had oriental friends, and west indian and white.
Me: Really, I thought you would've been comfortable around all these Indian people........

I then proceed to tell him the story of one of my friends whom I was reallly really close to in high school and in the last year she pulls away from us (the multi-cultural crew in high school) to hang with "her own kind".

Me: Thanks for the coffee. How come you didn't get one? (He was drinking a bottle of water)
OH: I don't drink coffee.
Me: Really? I thought all cops hang out at Tim Hortons (Canada's less expensive, simpler [none of this grande, vente nonsense] version of Starbucks).
OH: No, actually alot of police officers don't like coffee.
Me: Oh, it must be the donuts then......

Oh, and the best part was he was texting me when I met him and I showed him the text that he just sent. I have him saved in my phone as 'Officer Jackass'.
But even after all of that, when I left, he said that we would still meet in two days. That was our original "date". And he even texted me before I went to sleep. I didn't think my conversation deterred him.

But I haven't heard from him since. I'm not sure if I did something, or maybe he was really looking for a booty call, and didn't want to waste anymore time with me. Maybe he needed some time to let the conversation soak in before he realised that I am a raving lunatic. I don't know.

I'm beginning to think that maybe there is something wrong with me.

5 comments:

newer said...

Uhhhh. . .okay then :P
As Shaunette puts it "She's riding that single bus forever. . .but you may be the driver. . .LMAO!!"
Just kidding. . .but I found that story very funny. If he's not the one girl. . .he's not the one. The search continues. . .:)

Tru said...

can i see a pic of this hottie?

leeesssaaa said...

I'm the motherfrickin owner and operator of the single bus!!!
Unforunately, no pics. But beauty is in the eye of the beholder anyways. Although, he did look better w/ his uniform. I told him that too. Well, actually I said something like "you look different w/o ur uniform". But whatever, it's just the point of me being rejected. I've never had a guy not call me back.....

Tru said...

he'll call you back, just wait and see .... then you blow him off!

Moniksca said...

At least he made it known that he wanted a booty call upfront. no time was wasted on him which is good, hot cop or not.